We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
