Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET http://tfl.nu/jxod
  Replies (17) Good night (902) Bad night (4720) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one. http://tfl.nu/z4fm
  Replies (34) Good night (898) Bad night (3367) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks. http://tfl.nu/i5e8
  Replies (23) Good night (949) Bad night (5478) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy. http://tfl.nu/2x1u
  Replies (50) Good night (6989) Bad night (642) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain. http://tfl.nu/y8ei
  Replies (16) Good night (6860) Bad night (867) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost. http://tfl.nu/27qj
  Replies (8) Good night (3217) Bad night (970) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass? http://tfl.nu/vxrr
  Replies (16) Good night (944) Bad night (2134) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon http://tfl.nu/wym2
  Replies (3) Good night (1838) Bad night (569) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class (1-203): why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday. http://tfl.nu/0z2t
  Replies (4) Good night (3504) Bad night (483)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck. http://tfl.nu/89l5
  Replies (14) Good night (2418) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING (1-773): Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time http://tfl.nu/yjp9
  Replies (7) Good night (2293) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave? http://tfl.nu/vjuq
  Replies (11) Good night (2227) Bad night (585) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers. http://tfl.nu/38v9
  Replies (9) Good night (1500) Bad night (390) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.

  (1-660): View more from Missouri

  THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (660): I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before. (1-660): THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER http://tfl.nu/zmd9
  Replies (6) Good night (694) Bad night (225) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night. http://tfl.nu/wtly
  Replies (3) Good night (153) Bad night (379)

Randomize