am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
