I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
