We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Reggie can tackle my bush.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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