I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i barfeds in our rink
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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