I wanna bring you to show and tell
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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