The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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