two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Alive.
So much puke
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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