playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Every concussion has its silver lining
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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