Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize