were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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