i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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