Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize