even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
