Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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