Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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