Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize