we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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