i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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