Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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