Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
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i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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