he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
