Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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