Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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