Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I love you.
Bad choice
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
