I hate all girls vehemently.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
