so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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