You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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