You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize