I think i peed on brittanys purse
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day