we're blogging at a bar
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
