Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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