I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
