Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
