Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize