Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Farmville is her only friend.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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