Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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