There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize