god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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