38 yer olds are good kisserssss
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize