ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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