I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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