she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
