Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
