next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
