it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
