Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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