that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
