sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
love makes seman taste better
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
