Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
